–By Jan McInnis, Comedian and Keynote Speaker
My comedian and keynote skills came in useful recently as I was honored to be a commencement speaker this past Spring. My niece Sandy graduated from college, but since her university changed the day of graduation only weeks before the ceremony, she skipped the cap & gown walk to get her diploma. Her parents had a family party for her but we didn’t get to see a big, full-on graduation.
I have never performed comedy at a graduation, but I still I love going to them – there’s energy in the air as the graduates march to Pomp and Circumstance knowing that change is about to happen. In fact it’s one of the few times in life that you get a heads-up that the universe is shifting on you BIG TIME. Wouldn’t it be great if every life change, big and small, was preceded by appropriate music? Like minutes before a water pipe bursts and floods your new hardwood floors, you hear Otis Redding’s song “sitting on the dock of the Bay”. That way you’d get some notice so you could line up a plumber and get financing. But many of life’s twists don’t happen with a familiar song . . .except graduations.
But Sandy didn’t attend hers. . .which in my family doesn’t mean that you aren’t going to have a ceremony, regardless of your wishes. So my other sister and my brother and I decided to hold commencement in the living room, during Sandy’s party, and I got to give the keynote. I only learned about this engagement as my plane landed that day because that’s when my siblings came up with the idea. So not having much time, I wrote my valuable advice, on the way to the party, in the CVS parking lot as I was whitening my teeth (there would be pictures!).
What I came up with are the S.A.N.D.Y. rules. And considering I will probably never be invited to give another commencement address again (I’m running out of nieces and nephews), I thought I’d share ‘em with you as a little refresher for life.
S – Stop second guessing yourself. Today you’ll make choices that affect your future. Some of your choices will be terrible (perms in the 80’s anyone?). Don’t freak out. Most choices aren’t set in stone anyway, and luckily you’ll get other future choices to correct the bad ones. Make a choice and move on.
A – Always have fun. I live by this rule in my business and personal life, and it’s not just because I’m a comedian. If you make decisions based on things that have the potential to be fun, then even if it wasn’t the right decision, you at least had a good time. Enjoy the journey as you move on.
N – Be nice. Choose the bridges that you burn very carefully. I believe Karma will catch up to those who cheat you; your screaming at them won’t speed it along or make the punishment more intense. These people are not worth your energy anyway, and being nice also helps you sleep well. Be nice and move on.
D – Define success on your own terms. Whether success to you is a mansion in Bel Air or rescuing stray cats, don’t let others tell you what success is. If you define it for yourself, you’ll be successful a lot faster — like today if you want. Figure out what your success is, and move on to being successful now!
Y –Ask yourself WHY. People will tell you that you must “find your passion” in life. I disagree because that’s too hard. Instead, stop what you’re doing right now and figure out the WHY. Why are you spending your valuable time on this planet doing what you are doing? Maybe your job doesn’t pay well, but you love helping people, or maybe you hate your job but the hours allow you time with your kids. Figure out the why and then make peace with it! If you don’t know the WHY then you are wasting your time, and if you then don’t make peace with it, then you will never enjoy life. Every step I’ve taken in my career, from driving 50,000 miles a year to living in a 400 square foot studio apartment in LA (at age 40 no less!), I’ve always been crystal clear on why I was doing it, and I made sure that I would be okay if this was as far as my career took me. Answer “why,” make peace with it and move on.
So there you have it. . . my first commencement address.. . the SANDY Rules! I could have made it longer (her full name is Alexandra), but the CVS security guard was getting suspicious. So I give you the SANDY rules and wish you the best with all the unannounced change coming your way!
About the Author . . . Jan McInnis is a keynote speaker, comedian and comedy writer who has shared her customized humor keynotes with thousands of associations and corporations. She is also the author of 2 books: “Convention Comedian” and “Finding the Funny Fast.” Jan was also featured in the Wall Street Journal, the Washington Post and the Huffington Post for her clean comedy.
From a recent client “Jan spoke about how to use humor when implementing changes in the healthcare industry. Some people “busted a gut” laughing so hard, and she left our audience of CFO’s and Risk Managers in stitches (what is the ICD 10 code for that?). I think she would be a great speaker for any healthcare audience and everyone else. They say laughter is the best medicine, and it may be the only thing your healthcare insurance pays for these days…”
